Rambling

This should be the part where I’m talking about my arrival in Valdez and all my experiences so far. That won’t happen though, sorry. Just rest assured, that I’m having a wonderful time and enjoy life to the fullest (at least to an extenct, I am capable of). I couldn’t list and describe all the things I have done so far, because it would loose some of it’s impact it had on me and would end up sounding flat (besides them being unsuitable for public knowledge). So instead I’m going to write about assorted matters of importance. Like time. Or friendship.

I used to live my life in the future, never being content with the current situation, always grasping for a better time, better circumstances, better life. Obviously that never happened (well, not until I finally departed Germany, because that WAS an overall life improvement). So as I am sitting here I try to figure out how to deal with the persistence of time (time is a thief!) and not worry about what is going to happen (right now, I couldn’t stand to think about leaving some time far away), but trying to take little baby steps towards enlightenment in the present tense.

Before I continue (and eventually stop) talking about the future (not mine, but the promise of future itself) I have to include the mischievious bitch (sorry for the term) that is the past. The past is like an old wound that never really heals. You might not be aware of it’s presence all the time, but when you happen to incidentally scratch it, puss runs out (ok, I promise i will think of better, less gross metaphors for later comparisons). What I am trying to say is, that bad memories, personal failures, missed opportunities, or things that happened to you, that are just plain, fucked up (believe me, I know what I’m talking about) can cloud your perception of what is really going on around you (if it’s not clear enough, I’m only talking about BAD past experiences, good memories are cushions). Because you failed in the past, doesn’t necesarrily mean that you are going to fail again. I won’t go deeper on this now (becaus I feel that I might sound like some kind of motivational trainer, or shit like that), I hope I managed to make a point (and fear I didn’t), all I want  to get across is, to go out and fucking enjoy life!

Why am I even writing about that stuff? To be honest, I haven’t got a clue. I just felt like writing down some of the stuff that is going on in my head right now.

One last thing (after all, I did say I was going to write about friendship) is a big thank you to all the nice people here in Valdez that make my time so worthwile. I just realised, how (I mean HOW) important friendship really is and that a reclusive life as I used to have at certain times really pulled me down. The fences, erected to protect simply divide (I wish I came up with it, but it’s a quote by Peter Hamill, just listen to this ingeniously moving song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NEFns3wHt80)

Anyways, life is great and so am I, have a great day!